How My Own Therapy Helps Me Be a Better Therapist

When burnout, compassion fatigue, and overwhelming caseloads take a toll, prioritizing our own healing isn’t a luxury—it’s a necessity. My own EMDR therapy makes me a better therapist, reminding me that healing isn’t linear and that showing up for myself helps me show up for my clients.

Let’s get something straight—I would never ask my clients to do something I wouldn’t be willing to do myself. Whether it’s sitting with discomfort, confronting hard truths, or actively working toward healing, I believe in practicing what I preach. That’s why I recently started my own EMDR therapy. Yes, even therapists need therapy. And honestly? It’s about time.

If you’ve ever been in therapy, you know it’s not all deep insights and magical “aha” moments. Sometimes it’s more like staring at the ceiling thinking, “Do I really have to talk about this today?” But that’s exactly why I do it. My own therapy doesn’t just help me heal—it makes me a better therapist for my clients. Here’s how.

1. I Understand the Vulnerability of Being the Client

It’s easy to forget what it feels like to sit on the other side of the therapy room—the nerves, the resistance, the urge to crack a joke instead of answering a tough question (guilty). My own therapy reminds me how incredibly vulnerable it is to open up, even when you know the process is beneficial. It helps me approach my clients with even more empathy, patience, and reassurance that it’s okay to take things at their own pace.

2. I Get Firsthand Experience with the Work I Assign

EMDR isn’t exactly a casual stroll through memory lane. It’s a deep dive into past experiences, rewiring the way they show up in my present life. I know what it’s like to feel exhausted after a session, to wrestle with memories I thought I had neatly packed away. When I ask my clients to trust the process, I’m not just saying it—I’m living it. And that makes a difference.

3. I Can Call Myself Out (And My Clients, Too)

Therapists can be expert deflectors. We’re trained to spot patterns, avoid cognitive distortions, and challenge unhelpful thoughts. But when those same things show up in our own lives? Suddenly, our brains are full of excuses. “Oh, that’s not really a big deal.” “I don’t need to process that, I’m fine.” Spoiler: I’m not fine. And neither are you if you keep shoving things down. My own therapy helps me stay accountable and, in turn, helps me call out the same patterns in my clients—with kindness, of course.

4. I Practice the Self-Care I Encourage

Helping professionals are notorious for putting themselves last. We tell our clients to rest, set boundaries, and prioritize their well-being, then turn around and work through lunch while answering emails at 10 PM. My own therapy forces me to take my own advice. It’s a non-negotiable space where I show up for myself the way I encourage my clients to show up for themselves. And that, my friends, is a game-changer.

5. I Remember That Healing Isn’t Linear

It’s easy to talk about progress when you’re on the outside looking in. But when you’re in it? Healing can feel frustratingly slow and messy. Some days I leave my sessions feeling lighter, and other days I leave wondering why I ever opened Pandora’s box in the first place. My own therapy reminds me that healing isn’t a straight line—it’s a winding road, and sometimes you hit potholes. This perspective makes me more patient and understanding with my clients when they feel stuck.

6. I Model What I Teach

When I tell my clients that therapy is an investment in their well-being, I want them to believe it. And the best way to make that message authentic is to invest in my own therapy. My clients don’t need a perfect therapist—they need a real one. Someone who knows what it’s like to do the work, sit in the discomfort, and come out stronger on the other side. By being open about my own journey, I hope to normalize therapy as an essential part of life, not just a last resort.

Final Thoughts

Therapists are not immune to the struggles we help others navigate. We are human first, and just like everyone else, we have our own histories, triggers, and areas of growth. By engaging in my own therapy—especially EMDR—I deepen my capacity to support my clients with authenticity and integrity.

So if you’ve ever wondered whether therapists go to therapy, the answer is yes. And if your therapist doesn’t? Well, maybe it’s time to ask them why not. The reality is that therapists face high rates of burnout, compassion fatigue, and overwhelming caseloads. According to the 2023 Therapist Well-Being Report by Simple Practice, 52% of therapists reported experiencing burnout in 2023, with 29% currently feeling burned out. More than half (60%) cited work-life balance as a contributing factor, and one-third reported an increase in the severity of client needs. Burnout doesn’t just impact therapists—it affects the quality of care clients receive. The world needs healers and helpers, and those healers and helpers deserve to live full, authentic, and joyful lives. Therapy isn’t just self-care; it’s survival.

If you’re ready to do the work and have someone who truly understands what it’s like to sit in that chair, I’d love to help. Schedule a consultation here.